PERSONALITY MANAGEMENT

 

 

 

Two main types of personalities occur at two extremes of the spectrum of human behavior.

Type A Personality: AGGRESSIVE type. Always on the move, higher ambitions and goals, impatient, result oriented (perfectionist at times), bosses over others, usually selfish. These personalities are highly wound up most of the time. More prone for stress related diseases. They require modifying their responses to a calmer side.

Type B Personality: PASSIVE type. Submissive and dances to the tunes set by others. No free will or drive. Though they are not easily prone to stress, in the long run, this behavior could also lead to stressful situations.

The best behavior one can adopt is that of an assertive personality. Though personality traits are hereditary, personality characteristics can be modified to one's advantage. We will see how:

  1. Know thyself: The first step in Personality Management is analyzing your personality type. Write down your responses in the following situations and qualify them into plus and minus points:
    1. Your colleague remarks that you are lazy
    2. Your wife says that you do not love her
    3. Your girlfriend says that you are a cheat
    4. Your boss asks you to work overtime when you do not have to

In any given situation, your response may be any of the following types:

i. Aggressive: You feel angry, frustrated and moody. You may try to dominate, show strength and force others to lose in your favour. You feel tensed throughout and achieve success at the cost of happiness and peace of yourself and others around you.

ii. Passive: You tend to give up your right in favor of others. You cannot do any justice to your feelings and beliefs. You end up feeling hapless, resentful and disappointed. You allow others to manipulate you and end up feeling frustrated.

iii. Assertive: You stand up to assert your rights without infringing upon others' rights. You express your needs in a direct, honest and helpful way. Afterwards your self-confidence and self-esteem is increased. This is the desirable optimum type of behavior to be adopted to reduce stressful situations. We will learn more about being assertiveness when we take up assertiveness training.

  1. Do "SWOT" Analysis before you set out to do anything:

    'S' stands for Strength: These are the resources with which you can meet the demands (either internal or external). We have already discussed these.

    'W' stands for Weakness: Before setting out to do any work, you should also know your weaknesses that may hinder the progress.

    'O' stands for Opportunities you have around you that you can make use of to achieve your target.

    'T' stands for Threats that may come in the way.

    Try practicing SWOT analysis in the following situations:

    i. House Construction

    ii. Autoloan

    iii. New Job

    iv. Daughter's Marriage
  2. Time Management
  3. Anxiety and Anger Management
  4. Assertiveness Training
  5. Accepting Criticism: Any type of criticism can create great stress. Whenever faced with criticism, take a nice deep breath and tell "I am relaxing now"to yourself. If you feel that the criticism is with substance, you can ask for specific suggestions and alternatives. Avoid increasing your anger and anxiety, avoid argument. Respond in a quiet, calm manner without being offensive.
  6. Positive Attitude: Needless to say, a positive approach and attitude towards other people and events will reap benefits for you in the long run.
  7. Behavior Therapy: If you need help to specifically modify personality traits.

 

 

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